I chose my topic for this evening because I have a birthday coming up. Next week, I'll be turning 30.

I have high hopes about this birthday: maybe I'll start to look my age! Perhaps I won't get carded anymore when I want to have a glass of wine with dinner. Perhaps the comment: “Oh, I thought you were one of the students” will come less often.

Well, I can dream, can't I?

Seriously, turning thirty is something I have been looking forward to. As a rabbi, deeply connected a tradition that honors age, it is exciting for me to move forward. As my peers turn thirty, many are upset that their youth is slipping away. I, on the other, hand, have been counting the days until I can officially be a “thirty-something”. As an American, and a Jew, however, I am faced with an interesting juxtaposition. As a Jew, age is venerated. As an American, growing older is considered bad. In a society that glorifies beauty and productivity, older people are devalued. I am excited about growing older, and yet, according to the message of American society, I am about to pushed out of the ranks of “cool”.

American society continually sends out negative signals toward growing older: cosmetics companies make billions each year marketing wrinkle creams, make-up to hide wrinkles, and skin enhancers. Looking young, looking fresh is one of the biggest industries there is.

As America becomes grayer and grayer, we will have to face this problem as a nation. We will be forced to re-evaluate our image of beauty and productivity. I believe that we are beginning to see this process at work. The fashion industry is beginning to operate outside its' normal narrow scope of the supermodel in her teens or early twenties. We are seeing older models, and actors and actresses who—dare I say it—are over 35.

The cosmetics and fashion industry only offers only snapshots of the struggles that will be faced as our population continues to age. The issues surrounding social security, health care, and living arrangements are also significant national issues that may reach crisis proportion in the coming years.

As the miracle of science and medicine allow us to live longer, fuller lives, 40 is now not middle age. It is not unusual to hear of someone turning 95—or 100. What we once defined as old, is now defined as middle age. By 2010, according the book a Heart of Wisdom, 22 % of Jews in the United States will be over 65 years old.

Judaism teaches that one should continue to learn and grow—no matter what age. Ruth Rabbah teaches, “ better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof”. Old age is a time where one can broaden their involvement in the community. Our congregation is no stranger to this; many of our older Temple members make incredible contributions to San Antonio.

However, the stereotype of older people as past their ability to continue to their community still persists. Let me share a personal story with you.

My grandmother is in her 80's. When my grandfather died twenty years ago, she continued to live the condominium they shared. However, she gradually stopped being active. First, she stopped playing golf. Then, she stopped playing bridge. Then, she stopped painting-one of her true loves. She lost touch with her friends.

Eventually, she moved into a beautiful apartment in an assisted living facility. The place is incredible—there is so much to do, and be a part of, I'm almost jealous. But she does nothing. She sits in front of the television most of the day. My grandmother has succumbed to the belief that being old means being non-productive.

My grandmother may seem odd to those of who gathered here tonight, for most of you lead active, vibrant lives. But my grandmother is not alone in her way of life. Too many elderly are depressed, and believe that they have nothing to offer the world.

I can tell my grandmother she is wrong—and I often try to—but she doesn't hear me. Harold Kushner, in his introduction to the book, A Heart of Wisdom, teaches this about aging: “. . . suppose we could learn to see life not as something that gets used up but as the accumulation of treasure. Then with every passing year, we could see ourselves as having more life than we had the year before, because of all the new insights and experiences that the year brought us.”

Thinking of each passing year as the collection of wonderful pieces of treasure is a delightful picture. Think of how full our chests will be—indeed already are—if we view are lives as amassed fortune rather than spent wealth? How I wish my grandmother could welcome this image!

Rabbi Kushner did not come by this idea on his own. Full, mature lives are found in the Torah. For example, Sarah, our matriarch, lived until she was 127. Sarah had a child at 90! Savina Teubal, in an article on Sarah and Abraham, comments that: “that we know nothing of their lives as younger people, since nothing is recorded of that part of their lives”.

This fact is often overlooked. We enter Abraham and Sarah's life as mature adults. In fact, I've heard many say that Sarah's age when she conceived must have been someone counting by a different system; there is no way should could bear a child that old!

The lesson here is not whether or not Sarah could, or couldn't conceive at 90. Rather, let us embrace this insight: our Bible teaches us a vibrant story about a woman living her life to her fullest, well into her old age. In fact, the simple listing of her age can conveys a lesson, for every word of Torah teaches us something. That Torah revealed her age, may indicated to us that we can, and should, embrace the length of our days.

I recently read a short article by a man named Ben Engelman, who exemplifies this lesson:

“ I am ninety one years old and have been living in the Hebrew Rehabilitation Center for Aged in Boston for the past 18 months. Two and a half years ago, I became quite ill, went into a coma, and stayed for several months in the hospital and then in another rehabilitation center. I came back to life, although I cannot see well or read, and I am in a wheelchair.

I have a son and a daughter. For the past two and a half years, my daughter has been responsible for helping me. She found me this Home. If you have to be confined to a facility of this nature, this place is incredible. It has many different types of therapies and doctors. On each floor is a primary doctor and several wonderful assistants. Each floor is treated like a small community, part of the larger, whole facility.

When I first came here, I worried about what I would do for twenty-four hours each day. But I am very busy. I attend art appreciation classes and the mens' club in addition to physical therapy.

Every night, I have a little talk with God and pray for the health of my children. My mother used to sing a little song to me in Yiddish: God in His Kingdom is correct, God knows what He does. I still believe this. So I pray for my children and then I ask God to keep my wife resting in peace.

I've had some downs in my life, some tragic moments. Most of my family is gone, but here I am. I say kaddish for my parents, my brothers, my sisters, and my wife. I've lived a long time, ninety-one years, and nothing would change my belief. With all the ups and downs, God has been very good to me. “

To me, Ben Engleman has lived out Rabbi Harold Kushner's teaching: that life is a treasure chest. Engleman seems to understand that we live life best when we embrace it—whatever it has to offer.

There's a wonderful poem, “When I am an old Woman I shall Wear Purple”. It's about coming to one's true self—not being dictated by fad, or society. An excerpt from the poem reads:

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens . . .

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.
I wonder if perhaps I'll wear more purple this year? Don't be too surprised if I do!

With every passing day, we add treasure to our chests. The richness, I believe, depends on how we spend that wealth. I pray that, as our society grapples with the aging of America, that the stereotype of older people being less productive will be broken. I pray that we will be inspired to wear purple. I pray that we will be like Sarah, fruitful until the end of her days. I pray that we will count every day as a blessing, as does Ben Engelman.

Amen.

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